Lonely?

My dear Savior,

I've been a little down today.  Even though I know you're always here, I'm a little lonely.  I feel alone in my thoughts.  Alone in my feelings.  My life is a busy place, and my dear friend nailed it when she observed,"we just don't spend enough time in the right now."  But I know you understand. You know all about the need to be alone, but were you lonely?

The bible is full of stories that include you going off to a deserted or solitary place to pray.  Were you lonely for your Father?  I mean, He was always there with you, but not like He is in Heaven.  Did you ever hope to find a friend that could stay with you and get you?  (I realize you had 12 of them that you hand-picked.) But did you seek a soul-friend that you can just look at, and you both know the inside joke. I feel really dumb for wondering, because the answer seems so obvious. But it's really not that clear to me, I guess.

On the one hand, No.  You don't need a soul-friend, because you are the Creator of all that has ever been created.  You invented friendship, and you ARE the love that makes friendship matter.  So, of course, you, being GOD, need nothing from me or any other puny human.

On the other hand, Yes.  You went into the desert and were tempted in every way a man can be tempted. Everything pleasure a man could enjoy enough to put before his love of God, you experienced in that desert. Food, football, sleep, work, a really comfy recliner, women, men, the New York Yankees, porn, power, tight abs, none of it mattered more to you than the work you came here to do.  And what was that work?

You came to be my soul-friend.

You came so I would see you being solitary, and fearful, just like me .  You showed me that it's okay to cry.  It's okay to be afraid of what comes next, but to trust that God's got it handled. You came to get me, because you GET me.  Every inside joke, YOU are inside.  In every lonely moment, you are right there sitting silently by, waiting for me to be finished with my solitary time, so we can be together again.  I am never really alone, although sometimes I feel the distance more than other times. But the truth is, you came here to Love me and all the others who had a Jesus-shaped hole in their hearts, and were lonely inside for you.

Like the little 6 year old girl in the lunch room today who told me that June 18th is her birthday, and she'll be 7, but YESTERDAY she accepted you as her Lord and Savior, so now she has TWO birthdays!  She glows with your love. Sometimes I forget to let my little light shine!
 
I'm so glad for these nightly letters.  They remind me to talk to you, and listen.  They help me to see you better. You unravel my thoughts and set them aright. They make me think of you so many times during the day, looking forward to sharing some morsel of my life with you.  

Funny, I don't feel so lonely any more.

Love,
Me